Andy’s Visit: In Tokyo

January 26, 2006 in Japan

The obligatory “bright lights of Tokyo” shot.

Alright, now that I’m all rested up it’s time to continue The Tale of Last Week. Where was I?

Oh, right. Andy and I decided to go to Tokyo.

Having read all of my previous blog posts about Tokyo’s craziness, he felt that a trip all the way to Japan without at least seeing the megopolis would be a waste. But he didn’t want to go alone, and with my upcoming trip to Korea I could hardly afford the significantly overpriced bullet train ticket there and back.

I reckon if JR didn’t hire such grossly underage employees it wouldn’t have been so easy for me to make it to Tokyo and back on my old rail pass.

Lucky for me, the Japan Rail (JR) employees don’t check the dates on expired “all-you-can-ride” passes quite as carefully as they should.

Ain’t I a stinker?

Akihabara has one or two electronics stores.

So, I mentioned in my last post that Andy and I managed to blow through the necessary Kyoto sights at hyperspeed. I was pleased to learn that his style of travel is almost exactly the same as mine; he likes to cover as much ground as possible in a short period of time.

But somehow that’s not what happened when we hit Akihabara, the nerd capital of Tokyo. I guess the nerds inside both of us just felt right at home among all of those electronic goodies. So we took our time.

We weren’t the only ones who decided to take a quick break from the city’s insanity in the form of a quick and automated massage. Can’t compare to the real thing, but then for a total cost of zero yen I can’t complain.

Among the products we sampled were $1,000 toilets with automatic seat-raisers/lowerers, 70″ plasma televisions, singing/dancing animatronic stereo components, and yes, massage chairs.

What do I find the most amusing, you ask? The fact that in Akihabara it’s apparently acceptable to both shop for and read cartoon pornography in broad daylight, as these two fine, upstanding citizens prove.

Yet even with all of these fabulous inventions, do you know what Andy seemed to find the most amusing? The Japanese store clerks dusting leaves on the store’s decorative plants one-by-one.

Apparently cleanliness isn’t quite as emphasized in China as it is over here in the land of the rising sun.

Electronics aren’t the only things in Akihabara that companies use to appeal to the nerd mentality. Real-life anime characters with warm smiles make even the most socially inept feel like real men in this part of town!

Aside from our day in Akihabara and a few other brief excursions, the highlight of our trip to Tokyo was - as always - the nightlife. I would like to state that neither of the two nights we spent out on the town worked to hurt Andy’s positive perception of this country.

Quite to the contrary, in fact.

Let’s just say that even in an enormous 2,000+ person nightclub the gaijin still somehow never suffer from a lack of positive attention.

There are a number of rumors floating around regarding the smallness of many things Japanese. I present the following evidence: A Japanese-sized Slim Jim. For those of you who don’t know what a Slim Jim is, I highly recommend viewing the hilarious old 80’s commercials starring Randy Savage (link to the left of this picture)

But as all good things, our trip finally had to come to an end. Andy wanted to make sure that he had the opportunity to stay in a capsule hotel at least once before leaving the country, so we got our butts in gear and pushed through one of the more challenging days I’ve experienced in awhile. Here’s how it went:

(Slim Jim Commercial)

Taiko-no-Tatsujin! Only the most kickass arcade game ever!

12:00am) Enter Club Vanilla.
6:30am) Leave Club Vanilla and return to our hostel. Eat numerous ice cream bars at a convenience store along the way. Ramble to each other in an intoxicated fashion.
7:30am) Somehow manage to get completely packed and stumble onto a subway to Tokyo station. Board a bullet train for Kyoto.
9:02am) Dizziness turns to headache. Ramble to each other some more.
11:45am) Arrive at Kyoto station, board a bus to my apartment.

I don’t want to leave you all with the impression that I’m some oddball gaijin incapable of being serious. As proof to the contrary, here’s the most serious picture I’ve ever taken.

12:45am) Andy re-packs all of his bags for the trip back to China.
2:00pm) Sleep for one and a half hours.
3:30pm) Ride a bus back to Kyoto station, and an express train to Kansai Airport. Eat at MOS burger along the way.
6:30pm) Reach the airport. Ask seven different information desks about where we can find a capsule hotel nearby.
7:15pm) Board a train going back in the direction we just came from. No capsule hotels by the airport.

We seem to have somehow damaged the subway ticket-checking machine during our post-club stupor. Good thing there was a trusty JR attendant nearby to handle the situation.

7:45pm) Arrive in Downtown, Osaka. Check Andy into a capsule hotel. Laugh together at the silliness of the concept.
8:15pm) Say goodbye. Board a train back to Kyoto.
9:15pm) Arrive at Kyoto Station. I have missed the last bus of the day that will take me all the way home. Get on another train to Hanazono, the closest station to where I live.
9:35pm) Begin walking home in the snow with only one glove. I guess packing your bags still drunk from an all-night club isn’t a fool-proof endeavor.
10:15) Arrive. Sleep. For fifteen hours.

Peace!

And yet another of my strange adventures in Japan has come to a close.

1 Comment »

Comment from andrewstrauss

January 27, 2006 @ 3:42 am

WORD! Now that was a tight trip…..and that was only a few of the highlights

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